Brick NJ - Safest City in America

Growing up, I spent every summer in Brick NJ. My parents retired there after I graduated from highschool. The land that their house stands on has been in my family since the 1940's. So basically, my grandparents spent their summers there, my parents spent their summers there (and actually met there)...I spent my summers there. {Yes, you can start humming the Andy Griffith Show theme song in your head now}.

I discovered this morning that it's more like Andy Griffith's Mayberry than I thought. Brick has been voted the #1 safest city in the United States. That's right people, the #1 safest city is in New Jersey - parkway exit 88, bitches!

According to the article, the rankings are based on FBI statistics that were released in June. I've got my own theories about why Brick has been ranked #1 among safest cities. Here are a couple of the contributing factors:

1) The Geriatric Effect: Not unlike Florida - old people in NJ go to Brick to...ahem...die. I'm being dead serious here (pun intended). There are more retirement villages in Brick, per capita than in any other city i've been too (excluding Florida, of course). Here's an example of one such "Active Adult Community" - Leisure Village.

2) The Cop Factor: Brick is crawling with cops. It seems that everyone who graduated from Brick High and never got out of town became a cop. Who wouldn't want to be a cop in Brick?! The old people aren't kicking up much of a fuss; it's close to the beach; and if all your friends are cops, why not join the party?!

3) "The Godfather" Factor: Sometimes a bunch of huge bodyguard looking types buy a house down the street from you. And sometimes those big guys drive really nice cars and work odd hours. And sometimes those guys want to fly under the radar and blend in like everyone else so they obey the speed limit, pick up after their dogs, and generally make fantastic neighbors. Their silent presence is enough to maintain order in the neighborhood - nobody in their right minds is going to mess with them or their neighbors (who are mostly cops). As long as everyone minds their business - nobody gets hurt.

Now that's something you won't find in the FBI reports.

"Travelling down the Turnpike, heading for the shore, a thought just then occured to me I never thought before. I've been a lot of places, seen pictures of the rest, but of all the places I can think of, I like Jersey best."
-John Pizarelli